40 Comments
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Walyullah's avatar

I don't need to say it's well penned since your son's already told you haha.

I think the thing I like the best is the attitudinal shift in parenting, from a pov of top-down teaching to a more collaborative learning/co-teaching.

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Sanobar Sabah's avatar

Absolutely :) Thank you!

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Alaknanda Sengupta's avatar

You sure are bringing them up right! 💯💖💖 This is so full of the love and wisdom and all the good things that motherhood brings!🌿🌿

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Sanobar Sabah's avatar

Amen! Thank you, Alaknanda 💖

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Pritam Sukumar's avatar

Wow I’m glad I came across your Substack because of your note. This is lovely, and it’s not just your children who are learning from this — include me too in the list!

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Sanobar Sabah's avatar

ha ha haaaa Oh this is delightful! Thank you, Pritam; glad to be of some use!

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Rakhi Kurup's avatar

Such a beautiful letter Sanobar. I was in tears from the last line of the the first para. To be able to express oneself well is an art, most of us go through life without realising this.

Congratulations to you for expressing yourself so well in the letter. Your children will find strength in this forever and more.

Recently, one of my boys asked me that I should write something for them, which is meant exclusively for them and leave it around for them to find when I am gone. I have been thinking about it, your letter gives me hope that I can try too.

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Sanobar Sabah's avatar

Oh Rakhi...you must be doing something right for your kid to ask you to leave a letter behind! Thank you for dropping by and leaving this wonderful note. I smiled as I read it :)

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Sandeep Kumar Verma's avatar

After all one of the two parents have to take responsibility to make them a good citizen.

You are doing it well. Still they need your support and later they will sure respond same way to you too.

Your words let me feel as if you have grown your kids as single parent like me.

It seems that I have written it for my kids! My both kids are born in the month of August. Now they are about to get married.

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Sanobar Sabah's avatar

Thank you for your kindness! You may have missed my 'old man' in the essay :) Together we do a great job of showing our kids what normal, flawed human beings are like lol

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ulhas vairagkar's avatar

Beautiful -:)

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Sanobar Sabah's avatar

Thank you :)

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Minaz Ansari's avatar

Such honest, heartfelt writing Sanober! Your kids will cherish this for life. God bless them! May your family always be together in peace and joy and good health. Ameen.

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Sanobar Sabah's avatar

InshaAllah, Ameen! Thank you, Minaz!

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Samira's avatar

Saving this as a bible for my daughter. Thank you for writing it Sanobar! love and hugs

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Sanobar Sabah's avatar

Aaj hi tmhara zikr kr rahi thi ek aur writer friend se :) This means a lot; thank you Samira!

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Ayush's avatar

Such a beautiful read, Sanobar 💜

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Sanobar Sabah's avatar

Thank you, Ayush. I had to run away from the comments as I was so shy to receive the outpour of love and support! So grateful!

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Raju Tai's avatar

A blubbering mess this has made me 😭😭😭😭 You have no right to move us so vigorously and hold us so firmly at the same time, except we need just that from you. Uff sooo much love. ❤️

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Sanobar Sabah's avatar

Oh Raju Tai! Thank you so much! Tight hugs coming your way!

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Natasha's avatar

What a precious, treasure trove of words to gift your babies, Sanobar.

Thank you for writing this on behalf of a whole lot of us Mommies.

I could feel your comforting voice reading this out to my two poppets, on my behalf. Just the things I would have loved to say to them.

(I'm gonna share this with my 16 and 25 year-old. I did write a letter/blog post for them, on their birthday month last year. This one comes with a whole new set of things I'd definitely like to tell them. Thank you sistah. <3

Just that I "wish", you would not have tied this to being gone. A bit curious why that came up, though?

Big love and hugs to you and your poppets, this birthday month and always.

Celebrate!

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Sandeep Kumar Verma's avatar

It takes great courage to decide to become a single parent and grow kids the way we want to. That lets this happen on its own.

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Sanobar Sabah's avatar

Natasha, another writer friend expressed the same thing. I just don't know why did I write it the way I did. I approached it repeatedly. And I changed so many aspects of this letter. I wrote and did my voice recording at least 7 times (I kid you not- but that's because of the changes!). And yet, that's one factor I couldn't change. More on vn ;)

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Not The Wife Material's avatar

beautiful Sanobar! And happy birthday to all of you this October.

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Sanobar Sabah's avatar

Thank you so much, Savvy :))

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Supriya Devarajan's avatar

Awwwww Sanobar. You made me cry. Best mom ever you are! Lots of love to you and the kiddos. They are so lucky to have you as their mom!

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Sanobar Sabah's avatar

Supriya, it's so hard to accept this beautiful comment! I'll try ;) thank you from the bottom of my heart, my friend!

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Mukta Naik's avatar

I am reading this again and again Sanobar. So many lines I can relate to and learn from. I needed to read this today!

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Sanobar Sabah's avatar

How much we need each other! I’m so glad we find each other through our stories! Thank you, phir se Mukta. Love and tight hugs for you...

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Sanmadi's avatar

I love the line ' Friends, marriage, children are extension of your life and reflection of our choices.' thanks Sanoberji.

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Sanobar Sabah's avatar

Thank you; lessons learned late in life, but learned nevertheless :)

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Anchita Ghatak's avatar

Brave and wonderful! Cheers to you and your family! Wish you all the very best.

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Sanobar Sabah's avatar

Brave, phew...yes! Thank you!

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